It’s been 3 weeks since they wheeled me in to remove my very unhappy appendix. It was such a shocker and completely not what I expected to be the problem. Since I’m usually willing to see the gift in situations like this, I decided I better figure out what the lesson was/is. As soon as I had the energy I got out my book, Feelings Buried Alive by Karol Truman, and read that one of the causes of appendicitis is undue fear in life. Yep, that’s the one that resonated. Woops! I gave myself appendicitis from worrying too much, unnecessarily!
I had a couple of speed bumps that got in my way and I let myself get down. I reverted to old patterns of fear and worry. Three days after surgery I decided that it would be a good idea to stop those patterns. I would rather live my life from a place of joy rather than fear. It really would be much more fun, ya know? So I made up my mind to be in a place of joy and sit and watch the gifts of this situation unfold. What did I have to lose since I really wasn’t in the position to do anything else?
Blessings, love and well wishes flowed my way. Friends brought dinner over for a week, other friends brought lunch, flowers, gifts, even chapstick. Others sent cards. A couple of my neighbors helped me with my kids. Even my mom came down one day to watch my littlest. I witnessed my husband and children pick up the slack. My little two year old (today she’s three) was sweet, gentle and loving. Every day she asked to see my owie. And she offered to show it off to everyone who came to visit. I realized through all of this that I have learned how to receive. I learned how to receive support, nurturing and love in ways I had never imagined. My gratitude cup runneth over.
And the ironic piece to all of this is that because I was forced to surrender, the things I was unnecessarily worrying about resolved themselves. Offering me the proof I needed that operating in a place of joy really serves my best and highest good.